If you’ve seen the movies or played any of the games, you’ve seen them: the not-so-illustrious Gonk droid. Square body and just walking reallllllllyy slowly in the fabulous world of star wars.
Star Wars day, FDHS, February 24th, 7:45 a.m.
I marched steadily to the art room, nerdy determination flashing in my eyes, the jealousy of my friends Darth Vader outfit flashing in my soul. My other friend, an annoying, interesting, but slightly girl like senior was armed with cardboard and an exacto knife, and thus, the journey began. When eight ‘o clock rolled around our geekish masterpiece was completed, a cardboard box I could wear, so I took a sharpie and painstakingly… drew on the features of the undernoticed Gonk droid…..
FDHS, remainder of the day
Now, I should have seen this coming, but unfortunately I did not. Throughout the day my box was battered by hands, I was told to remove it, one really REALLY mean kid tried to push me down the stairs because the box had no arm holes, and I but barely persevered.
Now, as I said, I should have seen this coming. The Gonk droid is the most abused thing in the Star Wars universe, it’s constantly blown up, kicked around, and not noticed. In the games it’s always under laser fire, slashed with lightsabers, hit with Sith lightning, and all other sorts of catastrophes, and in Lego Star Wars it’s actually a common practice to set the Gonk droid as your partner character just so you attack it over and over again. In short, being a Gonk droid in general is fraught with perils, but being a cardboard Gonk droid in a high school that’s in an agricultural area….? That’s a feat equivalent to the seven labors my friend, and one I shall not so hastily attempt again.